121+ Best Bible Puns for Crafting humor with biblical blessings!

Welcome to our divine collection of holy-arious Bible puns that are sure to lift your spirits! 📖

😇 Get ready to part the sea of laughter as we embark on a journey filled with rib-tickling wordplay inspired by the Good Book.

🚶‍♂️ Whether you’re a fan of the Old Testament, the New Testament, or just love a good pun, these sacredly silly jokes will have you laughing all the way to the pearly gates!

🌈 So, gather your flock, grab your staff, and prepare yourself for a celestial shower of heavenly humor that’s nothing short of a miracle. Amen to that! 🙏

funny bible puns

Q: What do you call a pastor who can play guitar?
A: A “holy” roller!

Q: Why did the computer catch a cold?
A: It had a “byte” from the forbidden fruit!

Q: What do you call a story about a broken fence at the Garden of Eden?
A: A “gated” community!

Funny Bible Puns For Kids

Q: Why did Noah do well in school?
A: Because he floated his grades!

Q: What do you call a group of biblical fathers?
A: “Pops”icles!

Q: Why did the math book look sad?
A: Because it had too many problems!

Q: Who was the greatest financier in the Bible?
A: Noah, because he was floating his stock while everyone else was in liquidation!

Q: What’s the most musical part of the Bible?
A: When the Lord said, “Let there be light!”

Q: What is the shortest chapter in the Bible?
A: Psalms 117, it has only two verses!

Hilarious Bible Puns For Kids

Q: Who was the fastest runner in the Bible?
A: Adam, because he was first in the human race!

Q: How do you make holy water?
A: You boil the hell out of it!

Q: Why did the tomato turn red?
A: Because it saw the salad dressing!

Q: Why was Solomon such a great businessman?
A: He cornered the market on wisdom!

Q: Who was the most financially savvy woman in the Bible?
A: Pharaoh’s daughter – she went to the bank of the Nile and pulled out a prophet!

Q: How do we know that Peter was a rich fisherman?
A: By his net income!

Incredible Bible Puns For Kids

Q: Why did Noah become a professional boxer?
A: He knew all about the ark of the covenant!

Q: Why was Moses the best basketball player?
A: He knew how to part the defense!

Q: What’s a Bible character’s favorite type of music?
A: Psalm and bass!

Q: What did Adam say on the day before Christmas?
A: It’s Christmas, Eve!

Q: What do you call a sleepwalking nun?
A: A Roamin’ Catholic!

Q: How do we know that Job went to a chiropractor?
A: He had a lot of back problems!

Goofy Bible Puns For Kids

Q: Why did Jonah refuse to play cards?
A: He was afraid of getting swallowed by a whale!

Q: What’s Goliath’s favorite type of pie?
A: Giant peach!

Q: Why did Noah have to punish the chickens on the ark?
A: They were using fowl language!

Q: Why did Moses make terrible coffee?
A: He always brewed it on the mountain!

Q: What do you call a biblical superhero?
A: An ark-angel!

Q: What do you call a bear in the Bible?
A: Daniel (from the story of Daniel and the lion’s den)!

Amusing Bible Puns For Kids

Q: Why did the grape stop going to church?
A: Because it lost its raisin d’etre!

Q: What did Solomon say when he saw the Queen of Sheba coming?
A: “Sheba coming ’round the mountain when she comes!”

Q: What do you call someone who derives joy from the Bible?
A: A “psalmist”!

Q: Why don’t they play cards in the ark?
A: Because Noah was standing on the deck!

Q: What’s the most musical book of the Bible?
A: The book of Psalms!

Q: Who was the first tennis player in the Bible?
A: Joseph, because he served in Pharaoh’s court!

Silly Bible Puns For Kids

Q: What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A: A “gummy” bear, just like Samson after his haircut!

Q: Why didn’t they play hide and seek on the Ark?
A: Because Noah was always standing on the deck!

Q: How did Esau feel after he sold his birthright?
A: He was stewing in his own juices!

Q: Why did the lions refuse to eat Daniel?
A: He didn’t taste like the mane course!

Q: What’s the Bible’s favorite type of candy?
A: Scripture Skittles!

Q: Why did Solomon have so many wives?
A: He loved to collect wisdom!

Childish Bible Puns For Kids

Q: How do we know that God loves baseball?
A: The Bible starts with “In the big inning!”

Q: Why did Delilah cut Samson’s hair?
A: She wanted to take a little off the top!

Q: What do you call a biblical prankster?
A: A practical jokester!

Q: Why did the Israelites wander in the desert for 40 years?
A: They couldn’t find a parking spot!

Q: What’s a Bible character’s favorite type of sandwich?
A: A holy PB&J!

Q: Why did the disciples start a band?
A: They were fishers of men and needed some bass!

Amazing Bible Puns For Kids

Q: What do you call a biblical gardener?
A: A horti-cult-uralist!

Q: How do we know that God is a fan of tennis?
A: The Bible says that Moses served in Pharaoh’s court!

Q: What do you call a biblical baker?
A: A Holy Roller!

Q: Why did the Romans have trouble catching Jesus?
A: He was always cross-ing the road!

Q: What do you call it when one book of the Bible helps another book of the Bible?
A: Cross-reference!

Q: What kind of man was Boaz before he married Ruth?
A: Ruthless!

Best Bible Puns For Kids

Q: Why did the tomato turn red?
A: Because it saw the salad dressing, just like Adam and Eve!

Q: How do we know that baseball is in the Bible?
A: In the big inning, God created the heavens and the earth!

Q: What’s a vampire’s favorite book of the Bible?
A: “Vampires don’t like the Bible; it’s full of holy water!”

Q: Why didn’t they play cards on the Ark?
A: Because Noah was always standing on the deck!

Q: What do you call a teacher in the Bible?
A: A “preacher”!

Q: Why did the math book look sad?
A: Because it had too many problems!

Q: What do you call someone who makes bad biblical puns?
A: Punderful!

Q: What’s your working Bible?
A: Tonight we are going on Bible shower.

Q: What’s a Bible character’s favorite type of exercise?
A: Prayer-lates!

Q: Why was Moses such a good comedian?
A: He could make people laugh in the face of the Red Sea!

Q: Why did Jonah go to the seafood restaurant?
A: He had a whale of an appetite!

Q: What do you call a biblical detective?
A: A shep-Herod!

Q: Why did Noah get a job as a DJ?
A: He knew how to make it rain!

Q: How do we know that Paul was a baker?
A: He wrote a letter to the Philippi-pie-ans!

Q: Why did the people of Babel love playing Jenga?
A: They were great at building towers!

Q: What’s a Bible character’s favorite type of cheese?
A: Baby Swiss-us!

Q: Why did the Israelites play hide and seek in the desert?
A: They were great at finding mana!

Q: What’s a Bible character’s favorite type of cookie?
A: Fig-leaves!

Q: Why was David a great musician?
A: He always hit the high notes with his harp!

Q: What’s a biblical character’s favorite game show?
A: The Price is Righteous!

Q: Why did the people of Jericho love playing cards?
A: They knew how to bring down the house!

Q: How do we know that Abraham was a fan of Star Wars?
A: He had a son named Isaac Skywalker!

Q: What’s a Bible character’s favorite type of pasta?
A: Angel hair!

Q: Why did Moses get a job as a lifeguard?
A: He knew how to part the water!

Q: What do you call a biblical lumberjack?
A: A wood-en believer!

Q: What’s a Bible character’s favorite type of pizza?
A: Supreme sacrifice!

Q: Why did the Philistines love playing soccer?
A: They had a giant goal keeper!

Q: What’s a Bible character’s favorite type of candy bar?
A: The Gospel Gummy!

Q: Why did the apostles start a football team?
A: They wanted to convert more followers!

Q: What do you call a biblical magician?
A: A sorcerer of divine tricks!

Q: Why was Noah great at running marathons?
A: He had plenty of practice racing against the flood!

Q: What’s a Bible character’s favorite type of car?
A: A Holy Roller!

Q: How do we know that the apostles were great at basketball?
A: They were always fishing for nets!

Q: What’s a Bible character’s favorite type of flower?
A: The burning bush!

Q: Why did the apostle Paul love playing golf?
A: He was great at getting out of the rough!

Q: What’s a Bible character’s favorite type of ice cream?
A: Revelations Rocky Road!

Exploring “Bible Puns” has been a divine and enlightening journey! Did they part the waters of your sense of humor or have you walking on laughter like it’s holy ground?

Share your feedback. Your insights help our humor stay as timeless and entertaining as the stories themselves, with puns that keep the faith in laughter strong! 📖🙏😄

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