170+ Best Tool Puns to Hammer Your Funny Bone!

πŸ› οΈπŸ”§ Prepare to nail your laughter with a toolbox full of tool puns that will hammer your funny bone like never before! πŸ˜‚βš™οΈ These puns are perfect for anyone who loves a good play on words or simply has a passion for DIY projects.

From screwdriver shenanigans to hilarious hammer humor, our collection of tool-tastic jokes is sure to drill down on the laughs.

So, tighten your tool belt, grab your safety goggles, and let’s dive into a world of tool-arious puns where the laughter is always well-built and sturdy! πŸͺ›πŸŽ‰

Funny Tool Puns

Q: Why couldn’t the engineer use any of the scales?
A: Because all of them were tareable.

Q: Why was the writer who wrote a novel about sandpaper confused?
A: Because he wasn’t sure if it belonged to the friction genre or the non-friction one.

Q: What did the paper cutting instrument order at the restaurant?
A: A scissor salad.

Q: What did the scissor tell his partner on their date at the restaurant?
A: “I will shear my food with you.”

Q: What did the cardboard reply when asked about his plans for the weekend?
A: “Nothing much. Just plane around.”

Q: Which tool is never bent down by traumatic events?
A: A coping saw.

Q: What do you call it when a carpenter puts a pointed, long instrument into another pointed, long instrument?
A: Awl in awl, an efficient machinery.

Q: Which tool do you find in the bag of the Mexican magician?
A: A Magic Juan.

Q: Why were all the tools of the lumberjack broken?
A: Because of the axedent.

Q: Why did the mechanic lose all his tools?
A: Because he had no attention spanner.

Q: Why was the mechanic in love with his power tools?
A: Because his saw reciprocated.

Q: What do you call it when a metal object is fixed using metal by a metal worker?
A: You would call it an irony.

Q: Why are puns about stone tools never appreciated?
A: Because they tend to be Oldowan.

Q: Why is the shovel one of the most used construction tools even today?
A: Because its invention was ground breaking.

Q: What do you call a surgery in which the surgeon’s tools get swapped with that of the handyman’s?
A: A gut-wrenching operation.

Q: What does Snoop Dogg use for making his sculptures?
A: Four chisels.

Q: What do you call a jackknife from which all the tools have been removed?
A: A Swiss Navy knife.

Q: Why should tools never be used for sorting small and big fences?
A: Because it would turn out to be a fence sieve.

Q: Why did the businessman hate dealing in mechanical tools?
A: Because he was screwed over more than once in it.

Q: What do you get when you search how to light a campfire without using any tools on Google?
A: You get thousands of matches.

Q: What do you call a pruning tool that is unexpected?
A: A non-secateur.

Q: Which tool is found in the bag of a combat medic from Poland?
A: A war saw.

Q: Why are fanny packs not the right option to store household items?
A: Because they are just waisted space.

Q: Which office tool is most preferred by sheep?
A: A lambinator.

Q: What do you call someone who reads about amateur mechanical tools in-depth?
A: An avid reader.

Q: What do you call the science of discovering new circumcision tools?
A: Cutting-edge technology.

Q: Why was the hammer not allowed to attend the party with his seven other friends?
A: Because he was tool eight.

Q: What would you call a mathematical tool that supports the cause of farming vehicle rights?
A: A Protractor.

Q: Which tool is the most suitable for breaking open an egg?
A: A hatchet.

Q: What would be the name of the tool used by the Mexican to cut his small-sized pizza into slices?
A: It would be called Little Ceasars.

Q: Why was it a big deal when the huge measuring tool stopped functioning?
A: Because a large-scale surgery was involved.

Q: Why should you never try to steal tools from the kitchen where you work?
A: Because it involves a lot of whisk.

Q: Which kitchen tool is thirsty for your blood?
A: A spatula.

Q: What do you say to a hammer after it has successfully completed an assignment?
A: You say, “You have nailed it.”

Q: Why does no one wish to work at a factory of mechanical tools?
A: Because the job is boring.

Q: Why does no one invite the drilling machine to their parties?
A: Because it is a boring tool.

Q: Why was the hammer always invited to parties?
A: Because it really nailed the dance floor!

Q: What do you call a wrench that sings?
A: A tool-tenor!

Q: Why did the gear go to school?
A: To get a little bit of torque!

Q: Why do rulers love going to the beach?
A: They love to measure the waves!

Q: What’s a saw’s favorite type of music?
A: Heavy metal!

Q: Why did the screw go to therapy?
A: It had a few twisted thoughts!

Q: What do you call a drill that’s always on time?
A: Punctual power tool!

Q: Why did the hammer get in trouble at school?
A: It kept getting into arguments and pounding its point!

Q: Why did the clamp join the gym?
A: It wanted to get a grip on its fitness!

Q: What do you call a toolbox full of jokes?
A: A pun-ch box!

Q: Why did the pickaxe go to the dentist?
A: It had a chipped tooth!

Q: What’s a drill’s favorite type of candy?
A: Bit-o-Honey!

Q: Why did the nut and bolt break up?
A: They just couldn’t screw things together!

Q: Why did the saw join the orchestra?
A: It wanted to be part of the woodwind section!

Q: What do you call a wrench that’s always cold?
A: A frosty fastener!

Q: What’s a triangle’s favorite tool?
A: A pro-tractor!

Q: Why did the knife become a gardener?
A: It wanted to prune its skills!

Q: What’s a tool’s favorite type of clothing?
A: A socket to me!

Q: Why did the hammer go to the doctor?
A: It had a pounding headache!

Q: Why did the drill become a detective?
A: It wanted to get to the bit-ter truth!

Q: Why did the nut start a band?
A: They just couldn’t screw things together!

Q: What’s a clamp’s favorite type of movie?
A: A gripping thriller!

Q: Why did the pickaxe become a baker?
A: It wanted to chip away at a new career!

Q: What do you call a ruler that tells jokes?
A: A straight-edge comedian!

Q: Why did the toolbox go on a diet?
A: It wanted to shed a few pounds and ounces!

Q: What’s a wrench’s favorite type of dance?
A: The twist!

Q: Why did the tool become a chef?
A: It wanted to hammer out some new recipes!

Q: What’s a knife’s favorite type of party?
A: A cutting-edge soiree!

Q: Why did the gear become a fortune teller?
A: It wanted to predict the future of the machine world!

Q: Why did the triangle go on vacation?
A: It needed a little angle of relaxation!

Q: Why did the saw become a DJ?
A: It wanted to cut a new track!

Q: What’s a hammer’s favorite type of vegetable?
A: A smash potato!

Q: Why did the clamp become a lawyer?
A: It loved to squeeze the truth out of people!

Q: What do you call a toolbox that loves to dance?
A: A jig-saw box!

Q: What’s a screw’s favorite type of drink?
A: A twist of lemonade!

Q: Why did the pickaxe join a choir?
A: It wanted to mine its vocal talents!

Q: What do you call a knife that’s also a poet?
A: A sharp-witted wordsmith!

Q: Why did the tool become a motivational speaker?
A: It wanted to inspire others to build their dreams!

Q: What’s a wrench’s favorite type of car?
A: A tight-ning fast sports car!

Q: Why did the ruler become a therapist?
A: It wanted to measure people’s progress!

Q: What’s a drill’s favorite type of book?
A: A spine-tingling thriller!

Q: What do you call a hammer that’s great at poker?
A: A full house builder!

Q: Why did the gear become a photographer?
A: It loved capturing the wheels of time!

Q: What’s a clamp’s favorite type of ice cream?
A: A vice cream sundae!

Q: Why did the toolbox become a philosopher?
A: It wanted to ponder the meaning of life and tools!

Q: What’s a nut’s favorite type of TV show?
A: A bolt-action drama!

Q: What do you call a drill that loves to party?
A: A drill-ightful entertainer!

Q: Why did the gear become a politician?
A: It wanted to be a cog in the wheels of change!

Q: What’s a toolbox’s favorite type of dessert?
A: A socket and screw-pie!

Q: What do you call a knife that’s a great swimmer?
A: A cutting-edge diver!

Tool Puns

Delving into “Tool Puns” has been a hands-on and crafty adventure! Did they nail it with your sense of humor or have you sawing through the laughter?

Share your feedback. Your insights help our humor stay as sturdy and entertaining as a well-stocked toolbox, with puns that keep the fun building! πŸ”§πŸ”¨πŸ˜„

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